a quick pop in

December has proved to be a massive month
School is now out, dancing is done with (the concert was awesome... at least the little bit I got to see of it) & my Miss 7 made me so proud... this is her first year of jazz / modern & tap and she has picked it up extremely well.
This past week has been filled with kids Christmas break up parties, birthday parties and Carols by Candlelight, I am exhausted just from all the to-ing & fro-ing.
Now it's time for the kids to have some quiet time at home before Christmas Day... whether that's possible or not I don't know but I'm trying to remain optimistic.
I've got my gift shopping done, the food shopping is also finished... I couldn't buy too much in any case as our big fridge died last week & the new one hasn't arrived yet... we are surviving with a small fridge / freezer and a bar fridge... on the bright side it forced a thorough clean out of the fridge & freezer, something I've been meaning to do for ages.
Now all that remains to be done is my baking (shortbread, fruit mince pies & tim tam* balls) and keeping the kids entertained. It will be early nights and wholesome food too, we've slipped into some bad eating habits of late and it shows in the kidlets behaviour :(

And I've decided something!
Over the school hols, I am not going to stress about keeping the place tidy, there's no way it will happen when the kids are home all the time in any case. And I deserve a bit more of a break too since we're not going away so I have resolved to watch as many movies as possible and read as much as I can.
I am also pondering the concept of increasing my daily exercise (prompted by a visit to the doc) so that will mean from nothing to something... was thinking I'd try a zumba dvd to do with the kids (since they both like to dance)... I'll get back to you on how that pans out.

So if you have any movie or book recommendations for me I'd love to hear them (some of you have already given me some ideas on Facebook, thanks x but I'm open to more if you think of them)

I shall be back after Christmas, until then hope you have a beautiful Christmas x o x o

from Shish, Hubby, Miss 7 & Miss 3 (aka Poss)

*tim tams are an Australian favourite chocolate biscuit (Oreos are a good substitute)
The tim tam ball recipe can be found here it is the simplest yet yummiest treat, perfect when you need to bring something to a party / bbq etc Everyone will love them, you won't regret trying it!

November 2011

OMG! this has been a stressful but fun month!

the build up to Hubby's birthday was getting huge, I had lists upon lists in an attempt to make it work. For a long while it felt like we were disorganised and weren't getting anywhere but in the countdown the week before, it all came together beautifully. The little things that didn't quite work out didn't matter in the slightest which was a great relief. On the night, we had an insane amount of fun and that's what counts :)

Somehow I also managed to fit in a dance concert costume check (6 different items!) and get miss 7 to 2 community performances. I will add though that without the help of a fab friend, I would not have been able to do quite as much. I can not begin to express how great she's been or how thankful I am to have her in my life. She is too awesome for words :D

So the birthday party & dancing stuff pretty much consumed my month. There hasn't been much time for much else... I've dabbled with my Tumblr account a little, watched a little of my current fave TV shows (see October) and have been reading.

I finally finished "Game of Thrones", of course it was brilliant and yet I am so happy to have finished it. Normally when I discover a series of books I enjoy, I like to continue through the series one straight after the other but I really needed a break so I thought I'd read some of the free ebooks from Amazon Kindle that I'd been collecting.

I started with a couple of "erotic" stories but in all honesty they weren't at all exciting (or even interesting for that matter) but I figured what does it matter? they were free then....

...I started Promise by Kristie Cook, not knowing at all what to expect and found I could not put it down! I will be honest, it reminded me in some ways of Twilight (and I read somewhere in Kristie's blog / website that she was inspired by "an immensely popular series" in 2009, so I'm going out on a limb and guessing it may have been the Twilight Saga... I could be wrong)... however similarities aside I liked this love story a whole lot better. I love a story that sparks an emotional connection between the reader and the characters and I got that a zillion times over, also I love good strong female characters and I got that too! That's one of the big differences* between this book and Twilight, I did not like Bella at all.

So I zipped through Promise in a couple of days... I couldn't help myself, I had to stop and read whenever I could and when I wasn't reading, I was wondering what would happen next. I've also just finished the followup to Promise, Purpose and have enjoyed it just as much. I took a while longer to read it though, what with everything else to do and because I knew I'd have to wait till next year for the final book, "Devotion" so I wanted to savour it.

I'm about to start Genesis, a novella also by Kristie Cook which is a prequel to Promise :)

So it's all good here, hope you're well. And let the countdown to Christmas begin!!!!




*there are many differences and many things I didn't like about Twilight but I can't be bothered going into them all

Oct 2011

Hi there!
October has been a bit mad. Both my kids seem to have jumped to their next "stage" and I'll be honest... I'm struggling. All the shouting at home when they're together has really REALLY been getting me down.

Plus we've been busy with birthdays and gardening and school holidays... what I wouldn't give for some peace and quiet!!!

But I'm not here to moan (much!) so onto my "me" time which is a far nicer topic

Finally I finished my octopus....

and made some "coral & sea anemones" for Hubby's birthday party underwater bar

 We went to a party supply wholesaler and got lots of decorations so it's all coming together. Next on the list is to sort out what food we want to serve (all finger food) so any ideas you can share would be appreciated :)

Movies

Thor
lots of eye candy, lots of awesome CGI, lots of room for a sequel... loved it!

Green Lantern
yeah the story didn't really grab me, never mind :/

Harry Potter & The Deathly Hallows Part 2
Finally I watched it and it was a bittersweet experience. It was great but I think I had bigger expectations though I couldn't tell you exactly what I would change. The whole 19 years on scene didn't appeal to me but it didn't in the book either and I'm sad that it's over :(

TV
The Fades
I highly recommend this UK show! The first episode was a bit slow, confusing & creepy but once the storyline became clear in subsequent episodes it was awesome! It ends with a big opening for a second series, can't wait!

The Walking Dead
This show keeps me in a constant state of cringing on the edge of my seat. I could not watch it without Hubby by my side. Seriously I find it that scary... but I LOVE IT!!!

Doc Martin
I just can not get enough of his brusque manner, it is hilarious :)

The Vampire Diaries Season 2
It's a little tacky but so good when you want something easy to watch.

Reading

Game of Thrones... still. Edging closer to the end. When I'm done I'm going to need something a lot lighter to read, the sheer detail in the book is wonderful but exhausting. I've been downloading lots of free books to my Kindle via a page on Facebook "New Free Books for Kindle" none of the books I've ever heard of and many seem to be romances but I figure it's worth a look and if they're no good I can delete them none the worse for wear.

I've started up a Tumblr account if you're interested... probably the best way to describe it would be it's mostly of pictures that inspire me in some way and are helping me visualise my creative writing. The writing side of things is a tad slow at the moment, lots going on in my head but not much making it's way to paper. That I hope will all change once I've cleared my calendar , it's such a busy time right now!

a hunting we will go...

so I've been wallowing in self doubt / pity of late...

I think I need to find a part time job... for several reasons...

one being I have not worked for 7 years...

trouble is...

I HAVE NOT WORKED IN 7 YEARS!!!!

it's horrifying to discover how much confidence in one's own ability can go missing in that time.

I'm not looking for a career... just a local part time job, where I get paid and I can go home... no baggage attached.

Even the mere idea of looking for what sounds like a simple thing sends me in a spin

but I think I need to do this (if only because it scares the bejeezus out of me)

So last Friday I pulled up my socks, got some resumes ready and visited my local shops... I dropped off 5. Should I do more? I guess so

I'm kinda proud and hopeful

Wish me luck ;)

suck it up princess

I'm having a dreadful few days, PMT + the approaching full moon (tonight) does not go well with me.

This month I'm feeling down and out, I need peace and quiet to think straight and with school holidays on right now I'm not getting it.

So I'm doing all my "thinking" at night when I should be sleeping and being in this awful state of mind, it's all the "what ifs", the "you really should have done thats" and the "what are we going to dos?" bouncing around my head.

Talk about unproductive!

Hurry up and be next week already, I hate this ride and wanna get off :(

September 2011.... the beginning of the busy season

from now until the end of the year things get busy at our place... birthdays, dancing, work & school events, it all adds up and we run out of weekends.

To be honest I think that's why I persist with my procrastinating, a futile effort at putting the brakes on life. One thing I have learned the hard way is if I want to stress less, I need to be organised to get everything that needs doing done. So I must force myself to make the effort and just do it even if I'm tired or craving a little more me time.

Preparations for Hubby's 40th are chugging along... prop wise not a lot has been done in a while, I'm hoping to enlist the kids next week in the school hols to make a bunch of starfish and other seacreature decorations but for that to happen I still need to pull my finger out and get things made so they are at the stage ready for them to decorate. Decorating is the fun bit and the only bit that interests them.

My octopus is at painting stage but I'm waiting for a good time to do it... and inspiration with colours.

Photos will follow... I promise

BUT...
one big positive step towards the party has been made. We got stuck in and weeded the garden beds and tidied the yard. We've ordered a skip bin to be delivered so we can toss away all the greens and hard rubbish next weekend. Fingers crossed the weeds can be kept at bay until November.

Also we went to a masquerade party on the weekend and they had a photographer there for the night. He did a great job of getting people together for photos and saved the hosts trying to get shots of everyone as well as look after everything. I really thought this was a great idea so chatted with the photographer to see what his rates were etc and it turns out it is relatively inexpensive ($150 for approx 3 hours), he provides a minimum of 80 photos, edits where needed and gives you the files on a usb drive for you to keep.

Not bad hey? And all done with professional equipment so you don't have the problem of your flash not being bright enough for night shots etc. I figure it's a special occasion where we are going to the effort of dressing up and decorating and it's worthy of some decent photo memories so I've booked him.

So other "me time" activities...

TV...
finished True Blood season 4, when all is said and done, I was disappointed that the quality had dropped. It really felt a lot like a big fat soap opera by the end which really sucked. There are other issues with this season which don't sit well with me either and Mischa highlights it exceedingly well so do pop over and read her post.

Sons of Anarchy season 4 has just begun, no complaints :)

I started watching a teen angsty kind of sitcom (?) called Awkward and am loving it. Very quirky and I love cheering for the underdog.

Doctor Who... the second half of series 6, my only complaint is that it's going to be finished too soon

Movies...
I'll be honest, I have a stack of films I want to see yet I have not got around to it. I really REALLY have to feel like watching one and I simply haven't felt like investing that amount of time into watching anything...
except...
we had a family day one weekend and the oldies wanted to watch something with the whole family so it had to be kid friendly.All we had handy was A Cinderella Story... Once upon a song... and you know what? it wasn't that bad really... predictable of course but not excruciating

Books...
still on Game of Thrones, I'm not getting much read each night unfortunately (My kindle says I'm only at 45% !!!) despite enjoying it so much, my eyes grow heavy very quickly.

Massage...
Finally I got to go see my massage lady and came out feeling fantastic and full of energy. I did an hour and a half this time which was a real treat

And I'm back to my creative writing (yay!) I haven't written loads but what I've done has felt good. And I spend a lot of time sorting the story out in my mind as I do my daily stuff which has been fun.

So that's me for September... forgive me for asking but is anyone reading?

August... my least favourite month of the year

*sigh* August... the last month of winter here and after furiously staving off lurgies all season, along comes August with a wave of nasties in the air to bowl us over. And this year we copped it big time

Miss almost 7 brought home a nasty virus from school, she was miserable with aches and high temperatures for 4 or 5 days, Little Miss almost 3 picked up a lesser version and suffered only for a couple of days.

And me? went from a sore throat & croaky voice to full blown pneumonia in less than a week. OMG! it has been a long long time since I have felt so seriously ill and it has taken a while to recover.... realistically I am still not quite there yet but so so much better.

So being crook took up much of my August and "me time" was limited... much of it spent in a zombie like state in between coughing fits. I couldn't nap much purely because I couldn't lie flat comfortably or without coughing.

I was lucky to have the support of a wonderful friend and family to help with the kids and my already planned trip to Fremantle for Hubby's conference was a fantastic chance to really rest. I took books to read and dvds to watch but I didn't feel like it. Sitting, staring, vegetating was so much easier.

Towards the end of the month, feeling much better I did start to get back into things...

watching True Blood Season 4, I couldn't bring myself to watch it when I was really ill as I didn't want to "waste" an episode... as in not take it in. So I held out and caught up on it later

& reading A Song of Ice & Fire: A Game of Thrones by George R R Martin, having loved the tv series, this has been wonderful to read

mostly I've just been watching whatever guff is on tv, nothing really note worthy but we have gotten a giggle out of a show on SBS called The Hotel which is a daggy reality show based on the goings on at an English Hotel called The Damsen Dene.

my creative writing has been at a stand still pretty much the whole month, it's hard to be creative when your feel like crap but I'm keen to get back into it once my energy levels are back :)

oh and I almost forgot... my mother came to visit for a week this month too, I love her but jeez nothing stifles my creativity nor drains me emotionally more than spending time with her. This time round she tried my patience more than once and in my premenstrual state (which came to my rescue for once) I let her have it.
I don't regret it one bit... nuff said

the month that was July 2011

well it went super quick that's for sure!

I had a couple of rough patches ( see my grumbly post about parents ) but all in all this month was reasonably good... at least I resolved to push on and do what I wanted and not get bogged down in other peoples baggage.

The highlight of the month was the Good Food and Wine show, Hubby & I went with a few friends and had an awesome time eating and drinking... mainly drinking... we were quite tipsy by the end of the day. We also stayed in a hotel in the city for the night which is a real treat these days.

Hubby took me to a chocolate themed cafe "Koko Black" and we indulged in hot chocolate and what they called a Winter Spoil which was a yummy tasting plate of desserts. Just divine :)

We had thought about going to see the last Harry Potter movie but it was released in school holidays and we both hate going to the movies when the holidays are on so we're just trying to find a spare day that we can go... none have come up so far and I'm starting to think I might have to sneak in a movie day by myself.

Books... I finished Good Omens by Neil Gaiman, I thought it was quite witty but the ending didn't grab me. I've started Passion by Lauren Kate (the third installment of The Fallen Series) and it's great, the story is really coming together.

TV... True Blood Season 4... Eric *sigh*
Camelot... it is good but pales in comparison to Game of Thrones
Weeds Season 6... the story's getting a bit stale I think, I'm losing interest

Films... Red Riding Hood... great idea, great effects etc but didn't quite do it for me :/

Hobbies (Yes I have them! LOL)
Preparations have started for Hubby's birthday party later in the year and we are very keen on themed parties... this one will be a Pirate theme. We intend to deck (no pun intended) out the backyard as a shipwreck / desert island and under the patio will be Davy Jones's Locker / Nightclub / Bar.
We've started building props and I like paper mache as my medium of choice.... my first project in an Octopus

Oh and I've started to write... creatively. It's something I've always wanted to do, always dreamed of doing and yet never really done. I'm my own worst critic... it's a confidence thing (or lack of confidence thing) part of which comes from my upbringing... my Mum's negativity overshadowed any attempt to dream great things for myself and yet my best never seemed to be good enough for her... all very confusing for a kid. Reflecting on it all I've realised that I still don't dream big, for the most part I don't even try, there's always a negative nagging voice in the back of my mind. Sad really. It's time I stopped listening to that voice and start believing I can do stuff... to be continued :)

improvement

and relief I guess

further to my last post...

I have since dealt with both my mother and mother-in-law and I believe successfully in so far as I have stood my ground and not caved (which was typical of me not so long ago). No apologies were given as they weren't warranted and I made a conscious effort to stop "stewing" and move forward*.

And as far as I'm concerned all is well.

Yay me : P

*OK so I didn't hash it out with either of them... that would be making a bigger deal of things than they really were and would inevitably create bigger problems (talking from previous experience) so I've dropped the subject... until it arises again (which is entirely possible LOL)

fed up

I'm having a bit of trouble with the oldies at the moment...

my mother has developed an annoying habit of calling at the busiest times of day (but mainly night) in our household. for the most part I have been able to say "look you've called at a bad time can I call you later?" which I think is perfectly reasonable. in recent weeks she is calling as I've been walking in the door from taking the kids to their activities... this can be sometimes 7 at night and there's a whole lot of stuff to be done before I can think about my own dinner so in my action all stations mode I hardly feel like talking to my mum who more often than not just drivels.

last night (after I'd had a shocker of a day... and I'll elaborate on that in a mo') she called as I'm getting the kids organised for bed. Hubby answered the phone and promptly handballs it to me. feeling under the pump with the craziness bedtime can bring, seeing peace and quiet just within reach and already being highly annoyed about something else, I was a bit short with her... telling her I was quite busy and couldn't she call at better times? "and what time is that?" she asks "how about after the kids have gone to bed or during the afternoon?" "while I'm at work" "yeah" "right then" click... she hung up no doubt for effect and I'm sure to teach me a lesson but you know what? f*ck it!

on the other side of the coin and the reason for me being so testy prior to my mum calling.... may I present my mother in law
she too calls at the worst times, usually at 8:27am when I am just about walk out the door to do the school drop off and doesn't take the hint. Somehow I have yet to master the knack of being direct about such things with her.... it's trickier, she takes offense and then we must tread on eggshells for ages. gah!
so yesterday, she calls... it's school hols so we are not in the usual rush but I ask you... doesn't 7:45am seem just a tad too early to be finding out about the newborn great grandson? that couldn't wait till a more civilised hour? We got onto other things, she and Pop are babysitting this week for us and I have become accustomed to confirming dates and times with her as she has been muddled and forgetful. She recently came off anti depressants and I'll be honest I don't think it was for the best. Certainly she did not follow her doctors instructions regarding how to manage it and we have all struggled with how she has (or hasn't coped) but we have tried hard to understand. By no means do I think its any easy thing to do but I will say we are all impacted. Ok so with confirming days of babysitting we come up with some that don't correspond (which is disappointing but fine I can work around it and tried not to make a big deal of it) then she proceeds to tell me she wants to take Miss 6 to the movies that night instead of next Tuesday and she would stay the night. Hang on that's not what we agreed and something inside me snapped.

We had never agreed about her staying the night and in fact I am sure I had told her that Hubby and I had decided there would be no separate sleep overs for our kids (unless unavoidable) because the little one has started to notice and feels left out. But Miss 2 is too young to go to the movies... so a daytime session would be better and then Miss 6 could come home.  Here is where I hope most grandies would go "ok we'll do that then" but my MIL likes to have her way so she argued the point.

Trying to keep calm (because there is something about her that just sends me off the deep end) I tell her that I was not prepared to argue the point with her (god if it came to it I would take Miss 6 to the movie) MIL takes this as a red rag and makes a HUGE deal of backing off (and believe me that is so damn frustrating and infuriating because her aim is to make YOU/ me look like the bad guy).  It was all I could do not to hang up on her.

So that set me up for a very tense day... I am one for stewing over things... I called a friend, I spoke to Hubby, now I'm blogging.

It's just that I'm fed up, enough is enough surely? we can't go on not knowing where we stand with her and currently (and for a some time now) that's how it's been... a constant state of uncertainty

thanks for listening

a breakthough... maybe

a tiny glimmer of light shone for me this week re Miss 6 (almost 7) and her perplexing behaviour

this week she had a couple of really rotten days, she was rude, irrational and at times downright nasty. She was not acting like herself (even on a bad day) And it wasn't until I saw how she spoke to her friend that it dawned on me.... this is possibly a tween version of PMT*

then I thought back... almost to the day, one month ago she had another rough few days. She even took herself to the school office and asked to go home one day. The receptionist at school put her on the phone to me and it was clear what she was using as an excuse to go home (a sore foot) was not the issue but something on an emotional level.

So I have further research to do, I have got kids omega 3  fish oil and vitamins for her and hopefully we can at the very least try to alleviate her symptoms.

My guess is puberty is going to be a long and bumpy ride for all of us.

*yes she is only 6 (almost 7) but she is big for her age. And when I say big I mean tall and broad, she is not over weight. To look at her she could easily be mistaken for older.

June 2011 (man I really should be more creative with my titles...)

June has been a bit of a crazy month for me and has slipped past far too quickly, I've being trying to take a moment to make sense of it all and all I've come up with is that this month was just full of emotions

it's not hard to see why when I look back, I came off the horrid mini pill that I'm sure was doing more bad than good. It's side effects have made me an awful person to be around and you know things are bad when you don't even like yourself much.

So after much thought and discussion, I stopped taking it... and wouldn't it be lovely if that solved all my problems? but there is of course now a period of adjustment and rebalance and quite frankly that sucks just as much as being of the wretched pill.

I talked a bit about researching personality types last month, at first it was in an attempt to gain more understanding of how my 6 year old ticks and it has kind of helped me interact more successfully with her but as I read more I discover more about myself.... I seem to be a type 6... ruled by anxiety and overly cautious among other things... oh and at times plagued by perfectionism (type 1) .... this coupled with anxiety seems to fester into a fear of failure in me and so I often do not attempt things so as to avoid the possibility of not getting it right the first time. I'm finding myself fretting over unfulfilled dreams (particularly career orientated) and caving in on myself, paralysed with the lack of self confidence.

Ok so acknowledging this about myself and being highly hormonally emotional have made this month rather unpleasant. I have had moments where I have absolutely loathed myself and drawn the conclusion that I'm an utter failure as a parent.

Thankfully I've had other moments where I've picked myself up and got my sh!t together all set to do better, for me and the family. It's all very up and down (no doubt like my hormones).

A couple of families have inspired me to do much better and it's worth a look at their pages....

Lilah Sophie a dear child who survived when her family was told there was no hope and whose family have shared their belief in loving and living life to the fullest.

Alice Pyne a young girl with terminal Hodgkins Disease who writes a blog about her bucket list. This disease strikes a nerve with me, having suffered from it. I find I am filled with shame, questioning myself... I have survived and have I done enough with my life?

Taking "me time" has felt horribly selfish, which is silly because I think the whole tribe would benefit if I did.  I've snuck in the odd nap, done my usual reading (currently reading Good Omens by Neil Gaiman), watched the whole first season of Game of Thrones which I love! and watched the movie Paul, which was ok, kind of funny but not hilarious.

I am starting to feel more settled as the month goes on so I have hope that this horrid state of emotional flux will subside and become more manageable. God I'm looking forward to things feeling a bit more "normal"...

May... all rolled into one... 2011

I can feel myself falling back into old bad habits... not blogging regularly I mean... though I get the feeling I don't have much of an audience anyway... hello??? anyone there??? *peers into cyberspace*

May has been a bit of a blur, I look back and really have to think hard as to what I've done all month!

Hubby has been busy in the garden, we're simplifying as in tearing up the mess that was there and starting fresh. We've put down weed mat and red rocks to keep the weeds at bay and are thinking of using pot plants instead of planting in the ground. Notice I am saying "we", Hubby has been the brawn and done the work... I have provided valuable info as in "I want it like this..." LOL

A few befores and afters so you get the idea...

Money or lack there of is slowing us here, so we don't have a lot of plants yet. In the meantime I have taken cuttings from my frangipani and will pot them when they're ready but they probably won't be permanent fixtures in the garden and I have some herbs as well. It's a start right?

We have plans of making our pergola another living space... you might think that would be obvious but for an indoorsy type like me, I've always tended to see outside was where you hung your washing to dry and somewhere to put the trampoline for the kids.... so our pergola has had an undercover washing line which pretty much took up all the space for a long long time now.

Sadly my washing line is gone and I have to use my hills hoist again, but we are a state in drought so I guess not being undercover won't be such a problem all that often. Anyway... Hubby is reclaiming the space (I've been teasing him, calling it his man cave) and has unveiled his bar (which has lived under a tarp and only been uncovered for parties of which have been few and far between). He's put up some cafe blinds to stop the wind and leaves  and we've got our big dining room table out there... we hope to get an outdoor lounge one day but the table serves a purpose and we figure so far we've had no interest in anyone buying it so we'll make use of it. We'd also love to get an outdoor gas heater at some stage.

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My inlaws held a garage sale and we jumped at the chance of taking our stuff over as well, we sold a bit and gave away a bit and the rest we took to the tip's recycling area.

I'm still aiming at getting through more cupboards, so don't go thinking by some miracle I'm done!

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Now the trouble is, is that with the weather finally cooling down here... we've have our first bouts of lurgies. Sinus, colds and earaches for the most part but damn tummy bugs this weekend! We're all a bit washed out and yet the earth keeps turning... the nerve of it!

Oh and while I'm having a whinge... the kids! OMG! they are cherubs alone but get them together and it's WWIII. Trying to get a handle on it is very wearing on the patience and nerves... especially when you're feeling under the weather. I'm feeling like a big fat failure in the parenting department at the moment I tell you :(

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Me time has been hard to come by

but I've read...
Darkly Dreaming Dexter by Jeff Lindsay, which was great but having watched the tv show first kind of made it hard to go back to the book. I think I will read more of the Dexter books though

Backwards by a friends young daughter, Chelsea Burgess. She wrote this short novel when she was 9 I think and it is a fab story. She is destined for great things :)

The Enneagram of Parenting by Elizabeth Wagele, I got this hoping that it might help give me some direction of how to deal with my 6 year old and it has at least helped me see what personality type she is (at the moment). I haven't finished the book yet but it's fascinating reading.

I've just started Dead Reckoning by Charlaine Harris and it's so nice to visit Sookie again.

Movies...
I am number four... I wasn't sure what to expect but the trailer looked interesting but it fell short and ended up a bit too much of a teen movie rather than a decent sci fi story

Battle Los Angeles... speccy but I was left feeling a bit meh, I guess because it really wasn't anything new

Gnomeo & Juliet... ah it is cute and had me chuckling with the kids

Both Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory and Charlie & The Chocolate Factory are getting a flogging on our dvd player at the moment by our 2 year old. I can't help but stop and watch a little every now and then

TV...
Hurray for Doctor Who! I have enjoyed the episodes so far.

And I'm halfway through Season 3 of Sons of Anarchy, as my friends have promised yep it keeps getting better!

So that's it... I think... see you in June ;)

Me Time - April 2011

Looking back at April and it hardly seems worth posting as I really don't feel like I had very much Me Time at all

This is mainly due to my beloved children... and their erratic sleep patterns. I'm losing precious quiet time in the evenings (and therefore time in which I can settle into a good tv show etc) because if my cherubs go to bed too early, they wake abominally early (and hence wake me abominally early!) so we are trialing a later bedtime and for the most part it helps them sleep until almost 7am. Ideally I think its time to eradicate the daytime nap (or at the very least shortening it) for my 2 year old but that's been tricky and she almost always ends up falling asleep. I will persist and hopefully regain my time / sanity.

But here's what I did get up to...

I FINALLY finished The Girl Who Kicked The Hornets Nest and it was worth wading through all the back story. I did get the impression that there may have been more in the series or at least there was potential for the characters to turn up in other books had Stieg Larsson not passed away. What a loss to the reading world :(

Our wedding anniversary falls in this month and we decided to take ourselves out for the day. We enjoyed a Dim Sum lunch, something I've never had before.... it was nice to be able to try all sorts of different things however some of the dishes were not as hot as they should have been (or would have been nicer if they'd been hotter by the time they reached us in the far, far corner of the restaurant) and the service was not that great (though I was not surprised by this), also if we did Dim Sum again it would be with a bigger group (more variety = more fun).

Then we went to see the AC/DC exhibition at the WA Museum, it was good to find out more about the band's history (not being a huge fan, I know very little) and great to see whole families visiting together (parents who were obvious fans wanting to share it with their kids) but I felt it was lacking... it comprised mainly of photos and video footage, billboards and album covers. There was a case with 3 of Angus' costumes, another with Bon Scott's leather jacket and another with a guitar (can't remember whose) and that's what I had been expecting more of and was disappointed to find so little.
BUT... what was really cool was the collection of handwritten letters and cards from Bon Scott to family and friends. They were very entertaining to read :)

I did reward myself with another magical massage too... I am determined to save my pennies and have them as often as I can. I come out feeling so good.

I hesitate to combine my decluttering ventures with my Me Time but I have found that I am gaining a very real sense of satisfaction and peace with the space we've recently created in our home. Without the background "noise" of the clutter, it hasn't been anywhere near as stressful and I'm not finding myself gazing around (some) the rooms making a mental list of all I have to do instead if chilling. It's incentive enough to continue but I wouldn't go so far as to say it has been fun.

so a lot has happened..

and for the better

I am much happier... we are much happier and this makes everything easier, 'nuff said :)

did I mention I went interstate last month?

it inspired me in some ways in so far as decluttering goes... my mum (no actually... my parents) are hoarders. they wouldn't quite make it onto the tv show "hoarders" but they're close. I used to tidy when I came to visit, for my own comfort and I think it kind of became expected of me... then I had kids and I stopped. I was far to busy chasing them about to worry (though I would tidy away stuff to make their place a bit more toddler friendly)

this time my visit was for my mum's birthday party... that meant lots of visitors coming to their home and I just couldn't have them walk into the sh!tfight that greeted me when I first arrived. So I rallied mum and we tidied away (out of sight, out of mind unfortunately) stuff in the main living areas so it wasn't too embarrassing.

Still their place could do with a massive declutter and I've threatened more than once that I'll come over one day and toss all their crap out. I don't think that will be any time soon ;)

Anyway I came home full of beans wanting to sort out my own (much smaller mess)... then with the great unhappy white elephant that was sitting around at home things got waylaid. I fell in a heap, exhausted from the trip (notice I say trip and not holiday) but having to press on at home all the while feeling quite numb and empty.

A few things got done (minor tidies and chuck outs) but there was much wallowing as well.

Now things are better and with that comes new enthusiasm!

We've taken the Easter break and given our dining room / study a real make over. Our problem has ever been that we have tried to keep our big furniture in a small space. We have always reasoned that it was because we have a lot of stuff but I suspect part of it is that many pieces of furniture were our first... we paid a lot for them and had grown attached. Also (and this is why my parents don't throw stuff out) I have been brought up to not be wasteful.

But in reality I have been wasting space (ping... light bulb moment!)

So, with the in-laws planning a garage sale in the near future (saving us the hassle), we have launched on one mother of a clean out.

The huge dining room table, large bookcase, corner computer desk and filing cabinet are out. Replaced by a long pc desk (accommodating both our pc's... his and hers LOL, whereas his was on the dining room table and we never got to actually eat off of it!) and a small square dining table which pulls out to seat 6 as the need arises... which isn't often. Oh and we've brought back inside a smaller book case.

I have cleared out our filing cabinet, most of it's contents will be shredded and archived what we need to keep and we now can fit all that we had in a 4 draw and a 2 draw cabinet into the 2 draw. Seriously we had held onto paperwork for way too long.

I am sorting through my books and purging anything I know I will never read again. And it's much easier than I thought... the safety net of my Kindle has kept me from being too soft in my stay or go choices. I do not have all my books on Kindle as well but it is nice to know that if I desperately want to read something again it's easy enough to get a hold of it.

Our space feels good now, it's not quite how we want it... I think some pieces could do with a lick of paint to make it prettier and bring it all together but there is definitely a sense of having more space and that does wonders for the morale around here.

To be continued...

truthfully I do not know if things are any better than when I posted this

I am trying...

Me Time - March 2011

Films

Dinner for Schmucks - funnier than I expected. Loved the play dead theory

Burlesque - I didn't have high hopes for this film so I wasn't overly disappointed by the terrible acting and cheesy storyline. It was the costumes and make up that drew me to the film and really did it for me

Reading

The Girl Who Kicked The Hornets Nest by Steig Larsson  - I get that everything that characters are doing, the background stories etc all have a point but I find myself floundering in the mass of information. I am halfway through and truthfully I am looking forward to finishing this book... to reach what I assume (and hope) will be an amazing ending and to move onto something a little lighter


On other fronts, I used a birthday massage voucher this month. I have found the most amazing remedial massage therapist close to home who manages to work miracles for me. I was feeling a cold coming on and went to her on a day where I ached all over. I had debated with myself whether it was a good idea to go when feeling so shite but I was determined to have some relaxation, cold or not. I don't really understand how she does it (she's right into the spiritual side of things which I don't really get but I am trying) but I walked out with loads of energy, my cold and associated aches gone!

Oh and I travelled to visit my parents with my little ones... I wouldn't for a second call that "me" time. It was a change of scenery and an opportunity to catch up with rellies. One indulgence that I insist upon when I go though is to stock up on Haighs chocolates. They are quite simply to die for in my book :)

Invisible

that's how I've been feeling of late

with the fast pace of our day to day life, trying to keep everything on track and the acting as a sounding board to my nearest and dearest and their problems, I have lost myself

Something is wrong, I am not myself and I am unhappy

And those who should notice, have not

de-clutter efforts for February 2011

School went back and my computer desk was suddenly a mess again... what the!?!

I've been battling with routines this month; trying to get back into them (school runs), trying to establish new ones (re-inventing bedtime for Poss now that she's moved into a big bed). It's been a bit insane really.

And we've had a heatwave which has pretty much lasted the entire month, it has sapped every ounce of my physical and mental strength.

Suffice to say housework has definitely not been my priority this month!

Having said that on the hot but not excruitiatingly hot days...

I had a tidy of my undies drawer, which is only half filled with actual underwear, the rest of the space is filled with STUFF, all manner of stuff! Including a gazillion receipts, I've kept them just in case but then forgotten to clear them out when I didn't need them any longer. And I found 20 bucks which I didn't know I had! Woo Hoo! That little bonus made my effort worthwhile :)

One night when I was bathing the kids, I had a fossick around in our bathroom cupboard and tossed away lots of lotions and potions that we will never use. I detest the little bottles of shampoo and conditioner from hotels and therefore never like to pilfer them from the room but Hubby manages to pop them into our bag anyway.

*sigh* 

So now I tend to ditch them once we get home when no one is looking. Lots of them (gawd knows how old!) will make their way to our local tip this month. It was good to have a bit of an organise in this cupboard, I've found all the spare bathroom essentials I've bought and forgotten we had and so bought again so we're all stocked up for a while :)

Oh and I found some little bits and pieces will be perfect to pass onto Miss 6's school for their Mother's Day fundraiser stall, you never know I may just get them back again LOL.

And you may recall me dithering about what to do with our unwanted baby stuff? well, we decided one Sunday to have a crack at getting rid of it at a local Swapmeet. We sold some stuff but nowhere near all of it and I was surprised to see it wasn't the really good clothes that sold (and we weren't asking much) but at the end of the day it wasn't about the money, moreso the clearing of space. From the left overs I've worked out what will go to charity and what will be offered to my little niece (and I will be clear that I don't want to see it on eBay! yes I went there!)

I have higher hopes for March, fingers crossed.... I don't want 2011 to be the year of excuses :/

Me Time - February 2011

Films

Devil - quite a good short film that keeps you guessing, having said that I think they could have done an even better job. The idea had enormous potential to become a really terrifying movie. At the start of the film, Hubby and I took a guess as to who is the Devil. We both agreed on one particular character and turned out to be right but didn't know it for certain until the very end which was cool :)

Joseph & the Technicolour Dreamcoat - the 1999 version with Donny Osmond as Joseph, initially watched because Miss 6 has begun Musical Theatre at her dance studio and is learning the opening song "Any Dream Will Do". She is still learning to read so was frustrated when she couldn't read all of the song sheet in class. I figured this would be a good way to learn the words as well as see where the song fits in. I'd never seen or heard anything to do with this particular musical (apart from that Jason Donovan was in it in the UK) so it was a learning experience for me too and quite entertaining  :)

Love & Other Drugs - this was an entertaining, not quite your run of the mill romantic comedy, it also had a deeper side to it that made it quite thought provoking. Yes, I definitely liked this one :)

TV

Sons of Anarchy (season 1 & 2) - still good :)

The Secret Diary of a Call Girl (series 4) - oh how I love this show! very sad to find out that this is the last season so I'm savouring every episode :)

Being Human (series 3) - this show just keeps getting better. I have a huge soft spot for Mitchell, George and Annie. Nina not so much, not that's she's an awful character... she just doesn't hold the same appeal for me

Reading

The Girl Who Played With Fire by Stieg Larsson - loving it but it's taking me a while to get through it

Other Stuff... (what a rubbish heading!)

A friend put me onto a decadent little culinary treat which is just gorgeous. Fresh strawberries dipped in a little sour cream then rolled in brown sugar.... I know! but it just WORKS!!!!   I enjoyed it all by myself ;)

As a birthday treat for myself and a friend (her birthday is only 3 days before me) we went to one of those nail salons that have popped up everywhere in recent years for a spa pedicure. It was nice but I had kind of hoped for a little more for my money, no exfoliation (and my poor feet were in dire need, it was not hard to overlook!) and a crappy foot massage (in my opinion). Plus he trimmed my cuticle back so far I bled! I got the impression it really depended on the staff member who served you as to what treatment you got... guess I lucked out but my friend had a better person working on her which I was glad of since it was my present to her. I would have hated her getting a crappy experience and me a better one.

de-clutter efforts for January 2011

*winces* I must admit that this month has been pretty unproductive, mainly because of the summer school holidays. I'm lucky to keep my head above water housework wise in the holidays as my two cherubs leave a trail of mess as they play happily all day.

I did however make a little progress, out of necessity but it was still progress by my definition. In order to make room for the new toys that Christmas bring I had a weed through the toy boxes and a good chuck out. Any worthwhile toys that both kids had out grown went to our childcare centre where they're guaranteed to be used and the rest went to the bin.

We've found donating to the regular charities has become quite an embarrassing situation and not one I'm prepared to repeat... my husband took a whole range of things to the Salvos last year only to have a rude volunteer pick through our donation and take a few meagre things, criticizing the other items, even though we've seen similar in their store for sale. It was disappointing and disheartening.

But at home I discovered that changing things around for the kids has enabled them to rediscover toys they've had seemingly forever and simply forgotten about. So it's been a double win at home.

I've had a bit of a clothes cleanout for the kids too; just taking the outgrown clothes from circulation, storing the ones useful for Poss and those Poss is now out of will go somewhere... not sure where yet. I have a baby niece I would dearly love to give stuff to but her mum (SIL) doesn't seem to appreciate it and to be honest I worry the stuff would end up on eBay (and if I wanted that to happen I would do it myself).

The donation side of things has been soured for me and even though I would dearly love to send it all to the flood victims in QLD, authorities say it is better to donate $$$ and lets face it... sending stuff from the other side of the country only lines the pockets of Australia Post or some freight company.

I will work it out...

Oh and I have had a computer desk tidy and I can see desk top now! When I became such a slob I just don't know *hangs head in shame*

Me Time - January 2011

Reading

Dead In The Family by Charlaine Harris
book 10 of The Southern Vampire Mysteries
Just like all the others I loved this one. Sookie is a great female character, for the most part she's strong but she's not afraid to admit to her weaknesses and I love her matter-of-factness.
I'm also very pleased to find that book 11, "Dead Reckoning" is out in May 2011

Torment by Lauren Kate
the second in the Fallen series
the story of fallen angels is what I'm attracted to here. I'm enjoying it but am not as hooked as I am to the Sookie Stackhouse books. I like the main female character Luce in this book too, she's doomed (for lack of a better word) to her fate but she's still bucking the system. The final book in the series is Passion with no release date announced as yet*.
Films

Inception - clever but not really that interesting

Wild Target - mildly amusing

The Social Network - interesting but what is fact or fiction? is he really that much of an @rsehat?

Black Swan - bizarre, reality blurred with fantasy leaving me feeling very sad for the girl in the end. the dancing was beautiful.

TV

Sons of Anarchy (season 1 incomplete) - very different to my usual viewing but I can't stop

Carnivale' (season 1 & 2) - captivating right to the end but I, like many before me, felt a bit cheated with said end. The series apparently was meant to run over 4 seasons but was reduced to 2 and left too many loose threads to satisfy me completely. I found some relief in the show's Wiki page which discussed the creators intention for the future of some of the characters but it didn't cover everything

*Correction I stuffed up! Passion is not the final book in the Lauren Kate series... I just read on her facebook page she's begun plotting Rapture, the fourth and final book in the Fallen series. I guess I just imagined it was a trilogy DOY!

When words are not enough

Yesterday was my birthday

And rather than blather on about how much I love having a birthday (and I really do love birthdays) I just wanted to say that I have the most lovely husband who makes me feel so special and loved.

And I am humbled by his love and can only hope that what I feel for him is mirrored in my actions.

Thankyou my darling x

My new love...

My own special Santa gave me a Kindle for Christmas

I love books and I will probably still buy hardcopies of titles I can not live without but my nifty new gadget is lovely to hold, lovely to read (it's not backlit so it's easy on the eyes) and conveniently holds more books than I ever hope to read in my lifetime.

Seems I've finally discovered my gadget geek within

2011 - another fresh start

Hi
I thought I should put in an appearance just in case anyone is still reading. Drop me a line if you are... just so I know you're there. It's been 6 months since the last time I confessed blogged so I get it that many have not stuck around.

Happy New Year!!! albeit a belated wish now but it's heartfelt ;)

I have thought about making a new years resolution but the trouble is I know myself and my track record at keeping such resolutions and it isn't good so I thought I might tell you about an idea that struck a chord with me last year... from Dr Phil no less. Yes I watch his show, not everyday but a lot of the time and I do like what he has to say. He makes perfectly reasonable points about human behaviour and how people should treat each other.

Anyway one day he said, " What can I do today to make her life better?"

To give it context, he was talking to a husband who did not see the value of what his wife did at home for their family, he thought it was his right to put his feet up the minute he walked in the door from work, while she still ran around after the kids, making dinner etc etc etc
Dr Phil quite rightly pulled him up on his attitude and using himself as an example told the man this is the question he asked of himself each day... what could he do to make his wife's (Robyn) life better.

That question is still bouncing around in my head, months later

And it's not just one that husbands should be asking, it's everyone in the family and I am trying hard to use it as my daily life philosophy. Gives me something to think about before I act.

What do you think?